Alley:

Why did you name her Darla......hmmmmm - code name - so

If you take the "D" in Darla and add 7 letters, you get "K" and if you take the "R" in Darla and add 7 letters you get "Y"......you know what I'm getting at, don't you??

D+7=K     A      R+7=Y         L        A

What does that spell???

KAYLA!!!!!!!!!!

Drats! You've broken the code.

Now if you take 7 + 7 that equals 14, the number of times I have to f**t every day. And 1 + 4 =5, the number of times Kayla has danced on a tabletop. And 5 - 4 - 1 = 0, the number of times I have voted for a democrat.

See how everything fits together? Which, in the end, explains why the universe unfolds the way it does.

 Actually, before I was in love with Annette Funicello, I was in love with Darla Hood from the Our Gang Comedies.